i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
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