Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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