About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
