I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
