even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize
