weddingsv make me drug and hornr
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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