And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
