so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Randomize
