Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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