And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
