you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize