I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
