Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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