i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
