I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize
