I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
