i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Randomize
