Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
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