I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
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