And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
