oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
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