I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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