Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize