My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Drunk walkin through police station. America
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
