Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Randomize
