I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
and eventually we just all took our pants off
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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