I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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