singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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