Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Randomize
