It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
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