Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
