Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
