Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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