he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
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