hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize