Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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