You're completely useless in the revolution.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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