I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I don't deserve a penis
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
