After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
