i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
