i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
