i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
