He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
