Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
