i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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