Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Randomize