he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
