Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
