i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Dear god my vagina.
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