After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
