so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
