found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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