spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
